Speaking Skills: Words of Encouragement

Article by

Language level

Downloadable files

Speaking Skills - Words of encouragement

Learning goals

Skills: Listening

Language: Showing sympathy

Language: Showing encouragement

Pronunciation: Rising and falling intonation

Task: Complete three dialogues with sympathetic language

Speaking Skills: Words of Encouragement

In this week's Premier Skills English Podcast, Jack and Rich talk about how we show sympathy and the language we use to encourage others. Jack is sad about Arsenal's start to the season and Rich is not very sympathetic. The focus is on some fixed expressions we use to sympathise and encourage people when they are feeling sad or depressed. They also talk about the importance of intonation in our voices when we want to be sympathetic and encouraging. The task for listeners is to complete three dialogues that use sympathetic and encouraging language. As always, we also have a new football phrase for you to guess. Enjoy!

If you find the podcast difficult to understand, you can read the transcript and listen at the same time.

Read and listen.

Speaking Skills - Words of Encouragement

Intro:

Jack: I just can’t believe it! We’ve had a terrible start to the season. We’ve lost to Stoke and we lost 4-0 to Liverpool. 4-0!

Rich: 4 - 0, I know. That’s terrible. There’s no point in getting upset about it. All clubs have a bad run of form now and again.

Jack: That’s easy for you to say. Liverpool are playing really well at the moment. I can’t concentrate at work and I’ve got some friends who are Tottenham fans ...

Rich: Ahh don’t take any notice of them. Spurs aren’t doing much better than Arsenal.

Jack: Mmm … we need to start winning soon. I’m not happy.

Rich: It’s only a game, Jack. There are more important things …

Jack: It’s only a game!! I can’t believe you said that … How can you say that? You’re not being very sympathetic.

Welcome

Rich: Hello my name’s Rich

Jack: and I’m Jack

Rich: and welcome to this week’s Premier Skills English podcast

Jack: Where we talk about football and help you with your English.

Jack: What’s happening this week, Rich?

Rich: In this week’s podcast, we’re going to take a look at some of the language we need to be sympathetic and to encourage others, to show sympathy and encouragement.

Jack: That’s right. We’re going to look at some expressions we use when we are being sympathetic and when we’re encouraging others. Let’s take a closer look at this word ‘sympathetic’ because it can be a bit tricky.

Rich: Sympathetic means to be kind or show understanding to a person when something bad happens to them or they feel sad about something.

Jack: The noun is sympathy and we often show sympathy with the phrases and the words we use and the way we sound.

Rich: In Spanish and I think French, too, simpatico or sympathique means nice or friendly. You can say someone is nice - someone is simpatico or sympatique.

Jack: This is an example of a false friend - a word that looks the same in another language but has a different meaning. Sympathetic does not usually mean nice or friendly in a general way.

Rich: To show sympathy or to be sympathetic means to be nice when something bad has happened to someone.

Jack: To encourage someone means to give someone confidence about something.

Rich: You can encourage someone to do something. You can make them feel happier about doing it.

Jack: Or you can encourage someone about something. So if a person is sad because of the way their team has been playing ...

Rich: for example ...

Jack: yes ... you can say things to make them feel better about the situation - that their team will play better in the future.

Rich: You might have already noticed that at the start of the podcast I wasn’t being very sympathetic or encouraging to Jack about Arsenal’s bad form in the Premier League.

Jack: Yes, Rich used some phrases that can be used to be sympathetic or encouraging but from his voice, his pronunciation, you could tell that he wasn’t totally sincere, he wasn’t really being sympathetic.

Rich: Really? You could tell? Sorry about that.

Jack: We have some practice conversations and we are going to ask you whether you think we are being sympathetic or encouraging to each other or not.

Rich: Right, let’s get on with the rest of the podcast.

Topic Focus

Jack: In this section, we’re going to roleplay a situation where Rich is upset about something. You will hear the conversation twice. When you listen we want you to answer two questions. Number one - why is Rich upset. Number two - in which conversation am I more sympathetic and encouraging.

Rich: Right. Let’s go.

Roleplay 1

Jack: Hey Rich. Are you alright? You look a bit down.

Rich: I’m OK. I’m a bit worried that’s all. I’m going to the dentist later and I’ve got to have a root canal.

Jack: Ooh! Nasty! That sounds painful!

Rich: Yes, I think it might be. I’m not sure that I’m going to go. Maybe my teeth will get better by themselves.

Jack: Come on! Pull yourself together!It’s only a trip to the dentist. And anyway, they normally give you some kind of anesthetic to numb the pain.

Rich: Yes, yes I know what you’re saying and it makes sense but I still don’t think I’m going to go.

Jack: Just relax and don’t worry about it. I need to get a check-up, too. We can go together if you like?

Rich: No, no that’s very … er … kind of you but I think I can do it. I need to get my teeth done - it hurts a lot.

Jack: There you go. I’m sure it will be alright. There’s no point in getting all stressed about it. You’ve just got to get it over and done with.

Rich: You’re right, Jack. Thanks for the pep talk.

Sting

Jack: What did you think of the roleplay? What was Rich’s problem? Was I sympathetic? How did I show encouragement? Now, listen again. How is the conversation different this time?

Roleplay 2

Jack: Hey Rich. Are you alright? You look a bit down.

Rich: I’m OK. I’m a bit worried that’s all. I’m going to the dentist later and I’ve got to have a root canal.

Jack: Ooh! Nasty! That sounds painful!

Rich: Yes, I think it might be. I’m not sure that I’m going to go. Maybe my teeth will get better by themselves.

Jack: Come on! Pull yourself together! It’ll be all right. It’s only a trip to the dentist. And anyway, they normally give you some kind of anaesthetic to numb the pain.

Rich: Yes, yes I know what you’re saying and it makes sense but I still don’t think I’m going to go.

Jack: Just relax and don’t worry about it. I need to get a check-up. We can go together if you like?

Rich: No, no that’s very … er … kind of you but I think I can do it. I need to get my teeth done - it hurts a lot.

Jack: There you go. I’m sure it will be alright. There’s no point in getting all stressed about it. You’ve just got to get it over and done with.

Rich: You’re right, Jack. Thanks for the pep talk.

Sting

Jack: In the second conversation, I was much more sympathetic and I encouraged Rich to feel better, telling him that the dentist won’t be that bad. We used the same words but my intonation - the way my voice sounds - was very different.

Rich: So, there are two ways we can show sympathy and encouragement. Through the words and phrases we use and the way we say them. Let’s look at some of the phrases we used in the roleplay and when we were talking about Arsenal at the beginning of the podcast.

Jack: I could have said to Rich ‘Stop being upset’ or ‘grow up’ but those phrases are not very sympathetic or encouraging. It’s better to use phrases like ‘don’t worry about it’ or ‘I know, I understand’.

Rich: Earlier, I said to Jack ‘don’t take any notice of those Tottenham fans’. This don’t take any notice of something or someone is a common way to show sympathy and to show that you support the person you are speaking to.

Jack: We used lots of phrases to mean ‘don’t worry’. Phrases like ‘just relax’, ‘pull yourself together’ and ‘there’s no point in …’ are all used to tell someone to stop worrying or to stop being sad. They are used to encourage people.

Rich: But as you probably noticed in the roleplay, these phrases can be used to show sympathy and encouragement but if you don’t use the right intonation you they can have the opposite effect or you can sound like you are sarcastic or making fun of the person you are speaking to.

Jack: Let’s take one simple example. Listen to this question which one might show sympathy?

Rich: Hi, How are you doing? Everything alright? Hi, How are you doing? Everything alright?

Jack: The first time Rich says this sentence his intonation goes up. He is asking a general question as a general greeting, perhaps in the morning or in the street. Hi How are you doing? In the second question his intonation falls - it goes down at the end of the sentence. The situation is probably different.

Rich: Yes. I know that something bad has happened.We want you to listen to six sentences. Which ones sound sympathetic or encouraging and which ones sound unsympathetic?

Jack: Sentence one: Liverpool lost. What a pity!

Rich: Sentence two: Arsenal lost. Nevermind, you might win next week.

Jack: Sentence three: I know your favourite player is leaving but there’s no point in getting upset about it.

Rich: Sentence four: Your leg has fallen off? That sounds awful. I hope you feel better soon.

Jack: Sentence five: Your car isn’t working? How annoying!

Rich: Sentence six: You’ve lost your favourite bottle opener? You must be really worried!

Jack: The sympathetic sentences were numbers two four and six. Listen to them again and listen how our voices are different and try to copy them.

Rich: Your task this week is to complete the blanks in three short dialogues using phrases that are often used to show sympathy.

Jack: The sentences are ... number one: I’m so sorry that you broke your leg, Rich.

Rich: Yes, no football for a while.

Jack: Well, _________________. Sound effect

Rich: Thanks.

Rich: Number two: Did you win?

Jack: No we lost again.

Rich: ____________

Jack: Number three: Are you going on holiday this year?

Rich: No, I don’t think so. Money problems, you know.

Jack: ____________

Rich: So that’s your task. How can you complete the gaps in these dialogues. Write your answers in the comments section at the bottom of the page.

Can you work out this week’s football phrase?

Rich: Have you got a football phrase for us this week?

Jack: Yes, I have, but first, last week’s football phrase. The phrase was international break. The international break is a point in the Premier League season where there are no Premier League matches because many players are away playing for their countries in international tournaments or friendlies.

Rich: Yes, England did very well. They won twice and are one win away from the World Cup in Russia.

Jack: Well done to Khaldoun83 from Algeria, Shobonenok from Russia, Emir from Bosnia, Liubomyr from Ukraine, Ahmed Adam from Sudan and Kwesimanifest from Ghana. You all got the right answer.

Rich: What’s this week’s football phrase?

Jack: This week’s football phrase is a ****** ******. This is a type of goal you score with your head. This is not a normal goal with your head though. It’s a goal where the ball travels very, very fast into the net. It goes so fast from the head to the goal that we use the thing that comes out of a gun to describe this kind of goal. He scored with a ****** ******.

Rich: Pretty difficult this week. Right, that’s all we have time for this week! Don’t forget to write your answers to our questions and make a guess at our football phrase in the comments below.

Jack: And don’t forget to listen to our new round-up show called ‘This Week’. All the action from Matchweek 4 will be on the Premier Skills homepage on Monday.

Rich: Bye for now and enjoy your football!

How much did you understand?

In the podcast, Rich and Jack used some words and phrases that might be new for you. Do you know the words in bold?

Hey Rich. Are you alright? You look a bit down.

It’s only a game!! I can’t believe you said that! How can you say that? You’re not being very sympathetic.

There were a few more tricky words in the podcast. Do you know what they all mean? Try the activity below, then, listen to the podcast again to hear how we used the words.

Activity 1: In this activity, try to match the words and phrases to their definitions. All of the words were in this week's podcast.

John Terry consoles Eden Hazard after a defeat.

Showing Sympathy and Encouragement

In this week's podcast, Jack and Rich spoke about being sympathetic and trying to encourage someone. Sympathetic means being supportive to someone when they feel sad or down about something, or something bad has happened to them. To encourage means to give someone confidence and try to make someone feel better about doing something. Rich spoke about going to the dentist, something he doesn't like and something that worries him. Jack used some phrases to show sympathy when responding to Rich and also toffered encouragement. Take a look at these phrases from the podcast. Do you know what the nouns in bold mean?

There's no point in getting all stressed about it. You've just got to get it over and done with.

Come on! Pull yourself together! It's only a trip to the dentist.

There are other fixed phrases and idiomatic expressions that are used to show encouragement and to be sympathetic, many of them were used in the podcast. Take a look at the following activity and see if you can choose an appropriate phrase.

Activity 2: In this activity, look at the sentences and choose the right word to complete the phrases to show sympathy and encouragement. All of the phrases were used in this podcast.

England fans console each other after a defeat.

Showing Sympathy

Using specific phrases to show sympathy is only part of what you should do to respond in a sympathetic way when you are speaking to someone who is stressed or depressed about something. The other important thing is how you say these phrases. Intonation is the way your voice rises (goes up) and falls (goes down) when you speak. To show sympathy your intonation falls and your voice is often quieter than your normal speaking voice.

Listen to the six sentences that Rich and Jack used in the podcast again (listen from 6:32 to 7:51). Sentences 2, 4, and 6 fall at the end and are much quieter. These sentences use the correct intonation and the correct phrases to show sympathy. Can you hear the difference between sentences 2, 4, 6 and 1, 3 and 5? Here are the six examples from the podcast:

Liverpool lost. What a pity!
Arsenal lost. Nevermind, you might win next week.
I know your favourite player is leaving but there’s no point in getting upset about it.
Your leg has fallen off? That sounds awful. I hope you feel better soon.
Your car isn’t working? How annoying!
You’ve lost your favourite bottle opener? You must be really worried!

It's important not to sound insincere or sarcastic when showing sympathy.

Show some sympathy

In the podcast, Rich and Jack read out three short dialogues. Your task is to think about each situation and decide what you would say and how you would say it in each situation. Write your answers or mini-dialogues in the comments section and if you can find a partner, practise your dialogues at home. Here are the three dialogues:

Jack: I’m so sorry that you broke your leg, Rich.
Rich: Yes, no football for a while.
Jack: Well, _________________.
Rich: Thanks.
Rich: Did you win?
Jack: No, we lost again.
Rich: ____________
Jack: Are you going on holiday this year?
Rich: No, I don’t think so. Money problems, you know.
Jack: ____________

Write your dialogues in the comments section below and practise at home if you can.

What do you think?

In this week’s podcast, Jack and Rich spoke about how to show sympathy in English.

Do you show sympathy to a friend when their football team has lost? How?

In your language, what is more important when showing sympathy: the words, intonation or non-verbal communication?

Look at the task above and complete the dialogues.

Remember to write your guess at this week's football phrase, too!

If you want us to correct your English, just write 'correct me' at the beginning of your comment.